Someday i won't have you on my mind.....

The day haunts me with the memories of the past
The night bleeds the inside on something that could not last
And I lie on my bed devastated and numb
Half awaken eyes praying for a miracle to happen
And there I go again…crying a flood for you…
And you… long gone…will never know…
And I will never show…


I think about you all of the times,
what I did wrong what I did right,
did I give my love enough chances to survive,
or was the night the darkest before the light,
you could have waited, you could have trusted,
you could have been here right by my side,
was the reasoning not enough for you to believe
that I want you all my life, what is that you could not see
longing for an effort from your side,
to hold your belief , what did I have to fight
these handful of questions storm through my mind,
I tear my head apart, but they refuse to die,
I hurt myself to the point of being numb,
But they are back again, and I’m stacked again,
I see my hand, red with the strikes of the blade,
I see my face, blue and black, by my fuelled rage,
And the void never seems to fill within,
And I miss you, like suffering a punishment for a sin,
And you long gone…will never know,
Yes you will never know

I know I can’t mend this damaged myself in the coming days,
It will pain worse, maybe more than I can take,
Maybe I’ll go crazy with you running all through my mind and soul,
And one day I’ll drop down dead, will lose all my control,
I’ll cry a river for you, I’ll bleed an ocean for you…
People will mock me to crap, call me insane,
Abuses, insults, foul words, and I will still be the game,
I’ll fight the whole world to defend you existence in my heart,
I’ll fight the whole world, to make them realize, with you I will find a start,
Then I shall drown in these fake hopes of mine,
And realize they will never come true…
And I’ll die to hear your voice, to see you again…
But these feelings would just remain…
And you will never know, because I will never show,
Maybe I’ll rot and rust from inside,
Maybe I’ll drag myself closer to suicide….

But one fine day, ill wake up with you gone…
One fine day, I’ll wake up with something else on my mind,
One day, I will feel the air going down my lungs,
One day I will feel myself, kicking and young
One day all the questions will die,
One day the past…will just remain a past…
One day I’ll leave you behind…
Someday I’ll wake up and won’t have you on my mind…..