umm!! crap or something like that..

In the wake of lonely morning hours..

The stillness in my room makes me sick, sicker

Resting on a perched piece of wood, my thoughts begin to fall down, quicker

Open eyes and beating heart adamant against the death that knocks on the door

And I don’t have a life left to get up and open

My childhood shook me against the grey colors of wasted moments on ma terrace

One black tire of a car, and a stick in ma hand,

Away from the world, oblivious of friends

Hours rolled with the tire that rolled with me.

Plucking the dried leaves from a tired tree that stood for long,

Wanting to break down, wanting to fall apart just like me,

Always lonely

Bullied against the innocence that I possessed

The world after my silence, and my mind could never rest

Friends who mocked, people who thrashed,

When their fun was celebrated, I was trashed

The dust and the me,

Friends together, all other enemies,

Never to stand up again, we lay on the ground,

Hugged each other tight, free of the frowns

Love that escaped my very presence

Hatred that bred against the feelings

Ignorance that wiped out hope

A lover boy left reeling

And now as the disdained epitome of misery

I build my own ground

I build my own grave

I build my own death

Life has really not been sweet, so I’m being the same to death

But it doesn’t matter now, the sun is coming is coming down

The bottle of wine is empty now,

No money left with the me, who just broke down

Sleep my friend, the fainting sanity whispers in my mind,

For tomorrow your eyes shall again be awake,

And I just wish they don’t

And how I wish they just don’t

Denial of acceptance...

Clinging onto tattered pieces of betrayed past
Confused and dazed into feelings of hopelessness that have amassed
Resonating thoughts of a willful suicide
Symbolic mourning of a life…in water drained eyes that cried..
Constant invasion of devastating emotions
terrible love for a murderous malignity has begun…
Survival of vengeance amongst feelings that have died..
Bleeding soul embracing a wounded pride..
Lips sealed with an utter refusal against words
Silent screaming and deafening silence have allied
Numbness taking cover over already frozen blood
Torn apart every time at the shore of eyes the searing and billowing flood
Suffocating the sighing marks of already gagged memory
Severing the ties from the enchanting and the beauty

The resonant waves of resurrecting vengeance
Fills the soul with the burning black of the coal
Emotions flashed across the face like the sweep of sun-rent clouds over a quiet landscape
The insanity of a wild storm starts to cement the breeding hate
The Gone Haunts like the memory of some former happiness
Uncontrollable mourning just like the rage of the lust
The denial of acceptance banks across the stagnant water of life
Suffering grows creative, canvas becomes the body, the brush becomes the knife
voice like mournful bells crying on the wind
deafening trumpets for the rise of failure playing through a perennial stint..

Standing two steps behind the free fall of death
The incorrigible agony the agonized heart caressed
The hand waves a final goodbye to the useless sham of the world
A soul that lived death.. dying like a life at last blessed..
The impregnable emotions pushed to the fringes of deception
Loyalty has been proven, with misery emerged the best liaison
Nothing to lose after the loss of life that happened in the past
Prejudice against life into the creeping death has already begun fast
The autumn sweeps the dead leaves on the face of a dead man, mocking
The denial of acceptance….they say can still be seen, stalking…